


E-I-E-I-O

by trascendenza



Category: Star Trek (2009)
Genre: Character of Color, M/M, my holiday project 2009
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-20
Updated: 2009-12-20
Packaged: 2017-10-05 13:38:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/42321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trascendenza/pseuds/trascendenza
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>"I suppose 'I find you sexually and emotionally attractive' would be too simple, straightforward and honest, wouldn't it?"</em>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	E-I-E-I-O

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [takethesky87](http://trascendenza.dreamwidth.org/16629.html#takethesky87).

"Sulu," Kirk mutters under his breath as Sulu walks down the hall, glaring. "Sulu, Sulu, Sulu."

Spock raises an eyebrow, but Spock is always raising his eyebrow like it's a goddamn verbal communicator, and it _isn't_, so Kirk very pointedly non-verbally ignores it.

Or, whatever, maybe he doesn't really want to talk about it. That, too.

*

But then shit gets real, because suddenly it's all like Old McDonald's farm up in the Enterprise.

Because on that ship, they have a pissy Spock, with an eyebrow raise here and an eyebrow raise there, everywhere a raise-raise, e-i-e-i-o.

"Moo to you, too," Kirk says at Spock's retreating back, which somehow manages to convey disapproval even at twenty yards.

*

"You're going to have to talk to one of them sooner or later," Uhura says mysteriously one day, breezing by him with a mug of tea in one hand and a PADD in the other. She doesn't even grace him with a _hi, Captain_ or a _hello, Supreme Commander of My Pants_ like he keeps trying to get all the bridge staff to say. So far only Chekov has listened, and it takes him so many tries to get through it that it almost takes the fun out of it.

The one time Sulu said it, smirking and dripping disdain, Kirk simultaneously wanted to jack off and hide in a quivering ball under his desk. That was a normal reaction to a strangely charged and almost-sexual situation, right? Right?

*

"If I promise to sort my shit out will you stop giving me the stink eyebrow?" Kirk asked, panting, as they ran away from the latest group of pissed-off people with really big fuck-off weapons trying to vaporize their fine asses into not-very-fine space dust.

"I most certainly do not know of what you are speaking," Spock replied, and he wasn't even in the same neighborhood as winded, the bastard.

"I promise I will get my shit sorted out!" Kirk yelled, dodging the hideous love child of the unfortunate laser-arrow drunken liaison.

"Hmm," Spock said, and Kirk figured that was about as close to a "yes" as he was ever going to get out of the asshole.

*

"Fine," he said, sliding into the seat across from hers, frowning his Your Captain Is Not Happy frown that he wanted to start making his new thing that got people hopping to. Once again, only Chekov seemed to be getting with the program. "What do I _say_?"

"To whom?" She said, crunching on a purple Tarlissihniv cracker.

"Who do you think?"

She smiled, setting the cracker down. Then her grin grew, alarmingly, to proportions that warned the pit of his stomach that it was going to be in for some bad times, because whatever she had to say wasn't going to be pretty.

"I suppose 'I find you sexually and emotionally attractive' would be too simple, straightforward and honest, wouldn't it?"

"Um, yeah." His frown shifted into the Now Your Captain Is Fucking Confused, Stop Confusing Him version. "What else have you got?

She sighed, picking up the cracker, and shook her head at him with a bemused smile. She looked like she was on the verge of pinching his cheek and saying _Oh, Jimmy._

"You know, never mind, I'll just wing it," he said, sliding out as fast as humanly possible because everything about that scenario disturbed him, particularly the fact that he did not ever, ever want to associate the object of some of his favorite special-place-in-my-pants fantasies with his notorious cheek-pinching aunt Rhonda.

"Good luck," she called after him. "You'll need it."

*

"Sulu -- I mean, uh, Hikaru, is it okay if I call you Hikaru? As I'm sure you've noticed, not offending people isn't one of the top qualities on my resume, but if I could get through this without irreparably pissing you off that'd be prime, because --"

"Shut up," Sulu said.

Kirk shut up. The pit of his stomach was like _nice move on the big ass lunch before coming here._ It grumbled ominously.

"Let's get one thing straight," Sulu said, and his face was serious business, so it took Kirk a few minutes to process the words that came out of his mouth next. "I will never, ever call you Captain in bed."

He blinked. "Never gonna call me Captain in bed, check."

Then, finally, _finally_, Sulu smiled. "You, however, are more than welcome to."

And Kirk felt like laughing, felt like comming Uhura and saying _neener, neener, I didn't have to be honest, open, or straightforward, I win!_, felt like flying through thousands of kilometers of air beside Sulu all over again, just for the hell of it.

"Coming?" Sulu said, because Kirk had lost a few seconds, and holy shit, the doors to Sulu's quarters were open and Sulu was shooting him this _look_, this look that left Kirk prepared to call him Captain, Sergeant, or Old McDonald if that was what he wanted.

"Yes, sir," Kirk said, and dutifully followed him in.


End file.
